musing begin
How do you define friendship.
Its an assortment for me
from casual acquaintence to initmate lover
i'm not to fussed if I define you in a different place in that order than I am in yours
so long as you realise the responsibilities of the position you put me are the ones you gave me and not ones I took on voluntarily, you may be let down. I sometimes give myself more responsibility in your life than you do, if I fail to notice and get on your nerves, please tell me. In the end its up to me to manage my expectations not yours.
I do find blokes easier to deal with, I seem to have higher expectations of women
but basically it comes down to how much I give you
I give you enough to hurt me with (to a greater or lesser extent, and usually more than I realise (espically with the advent of lj)) and trust you not to use it.
I've sometimes done things wrong and suffered for it
I've sometimes done nothing wrong and suffered for it
I've done the same to others, so whilst I know why, i will still be angry and hurt when it happens to me and guilty and pissed off with myself when I do it.
Overall despite some peoples opinion I think i've done okay by most of you, I can't promise I always will, but i certainly don't have any plans not to. I cite one example as suportting evidence, my friends list on LJ is getting larger, with limited turnover since I started. So I'm guessing I have a handful of social skills and am bland enough not to get on the majority of nerves. My friends list is people I've meet and seen a few times, except for a few exceptions, so I feel its a reflection of my life. Now its getting a bit larger I'm wondering how much of myself I should be giving away to people I don't know very well. How closely should I manage my expectations of people??, usually i try to come across the same to most people, but this isn't always possible or sensible.
musing over
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